WTF Friday: Robbed by Sporkpoint?

Written by Ivy | 05 March 2010

WELCOME TO WTF FRIDAY!

I am so glad it's Friday, especially after the forced break last week due to being displaced from our house (via fire). Thanks for all of your prayers and for being so patient with me this week as I pick up the pieces of charred kitchen and smoky everything else.

As you can imagine, this week I've been looking for inspiration everywhere for today's post. My favorite posts are the ones inspired by those around me here in backwoods suburbia. And today, I'm honored to introduce you to Sweet-D's best friend Bob (aka Tuna). You see, Tuna got a letter in the mail this week. A letter none of us want to get. He was summoned for jury duty.

Tuna has a warped sense of humor like me, so I'm on a mission to find the right case for Tuna to rule on. I'll be posting funny, but real, crimes all weekend and through next week. These are the kinds of cases that would be perfect for Tuna, so listen up court system.

Case #1: Robbed by Sporkpoint?

A man in Anchorage, Alaska, gave in to a robber's demands after he pulled a weapon. The robber made off with his wristwatch, but not before attacking the victim.

Police have arrested a suspect, but now have to figure out if the weapon used in the crime was a pocketknife or a spork.

According to the Associated Press, the victim told police the attacker slashed his side with a pocketknife. His injuries, however, speak differently. Police report four parallel scratches on the victim's side, scratches that could not have been made by a single pocketknife blade.

A man was arrested a few blocks from the scene of the crime and charged with robbery. He was carrying a backpack containing a fast food bag and several sporks. The man was also intoxicated, which could explain why he slashed with the spork instead of the pocketknife. I wonder if he was carrying both at the same time? (There's an image: He was getting ready to eat said fast food when he got the urge to rob someone.)

Stay tuned for tomorrow's WTF "Find Tuna A Case" Marathon story: Who Stole My Weed?

Happy WTF Friday! Remember to live on the light side of life this weekend, you deserve it!

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